8-10-05

Return of the Mid-Week Rant

Heya kiddies!  As I sort of raised as a possibility, I am considering restarting my midweek rants.  Mostly because I'm an attention whore, but also because I feel you young'ns need my sage wisdom and guidance (not really...it's just the first one).  So the first item is a bit of news that I know will shock and amaze you:  the M (for Mature)-rated scuzzfest video game, Grand Theft Auto (there are some numbers and a subtitle here, but I can't remember them and don't care enough to look them up) is not suitable for children.  Okay, yeah, I know; it carries an "M" rating and it's long been known to glorify in pointless murder, brutal abuse and (if you can believe the title) car theft, but see, that's not why it's shocking and inappropriate.  It turns out that GTA 6(?) We're Not Even Sure We Have a Plot Any More contains an Easter Egg (yeah yeah yeah it's a mod that was hacked) that shows a very explicit sex scene starring both Olsen twins and the original cast of Les Miserables.  Or something.  To be honest my eyes start to glaze over every time people get appalled by something they knew was appalling when they bought it for their hyperactive twelve-year-old.
          This opens a whole can of worms for me because I really hate it when anyone tries to abdicate their responsibilities while maintaining the rights that go with them.  Seriously.  This is what it boils down to:  Lazy-ass parents who can't be bothered to regulate their children's exposure to "bad influences" trying to fob off their failures on someone else.  The box has a bigass black "M" right there on the label.  Beyond that, the screen shots that festoon the box show people getting shot at while feeling up digital prostitutes beside stolen cars.  And the game is called "Grand Theft Auto (er...something)"!!!  Go buy a fucking clue, you morons!!  If you didn't want little Johnny exposed to nasty, anti-social crap, why'd you buy the damn game?  Would violent crime be less scuzzy if it didn't have a hidden "get your freak on" scene?
High Gas Prices and You
          Okay, off that one before I give myself a stroke.
          The Bush-Bashers are getting a lot of mileage lately about gas prices.  The theory is that gas wouldn't be so expensive if we weren't fighting in Iraq.  The flaw in that viewpoint is that no one is holding back oil until we get out.  Saudi Arabia has increased production three times in the last year.  No, the current, wildly uncontrollable gas inflation can be traced back to two major problems:  One we've dealt with before and can solve simply by giving up our (by which I mean your) SUVs; the other is a little more complex and ties into the reason you can't find an actual American-made TV any more.
          The first reason is that the oil companies, being both greedy and not stupid, noticed that they can raise prices two cents for every penny they have to pay.  Americans, being the idiots we are, have found ourselves in the same situation we were in back in 1978, the first (well, second) time pump prices snowballed ridiculously.  Oh, sure, you have this nifty state-of-the-art SUV with OnStar™, a backseat DVD player and six power-ports (back in the old days, we called them cigarette lighters), but there's no real functional difference between that and your dad's 1973 Mercury Montego Station Wagon with the optional vinyl woodgrain (okay, on road trips you have to listen to 700 repetitions of the Spongebob Squarepants theme instead of "Ninety-Nine Bottles of Beer on the Wall").  They both have the fuel efficiency of a tramp steamer and that is why the oil companies are so positive they can get away with screwing you on gas prices.  We (by which I mean you—I drive an Escort) have to make the switch to smaller, more efficient cars.  Just like we did at the end of the 70's.
          The other reason may be enough to cancel any effect of economizing.  The other reason is big.  It's Huge.  In fact, it's nearly half of the world's population.  It's China.  You see, one of the side-effects of the US and Europe selling our industrial capacity to China in return for cheap labor is that China is developing quite the middle class.  Now the upside of that is that an educated middle class is the seed of social reform, and will always result in the destruction of a dictatorship.  The down side is that a growing middle class is largely composed of people with disposable time and money.  People who are no longer completely satisfied to take the bus to work.  people who want cars and TVs and all those other cool things that they (or their parents) have been building.  The difference between China's growing middle class and those in Europe and the US is that China has over three billion people.  Even assuming a fairly modest middle class size of 10 per cent of total population, that still more than the entire population of the United States.  That's a whole lot of consumption to appear in ten or twenty years.
          So get serious.  When you stop at th pump and pay more than you feel like you should, remember that it isn't Junior's fault.
Snapshot Reviews
          Last item on the list:  I'm going to lay down a bunch of snapshot reviews.  All of these comics are so big and so familiar to the webcomics world that you can find better and longer reviews than anything I'll ever write somewhere else.  I'm laying them down now, because then you can see the stars and I can just update them as needed.
Something*Positive by R.K.Milholland—This is a sharp, witty, but occasionally harsh look at life and longterm friendships.
Updates: Daily (more or less)
Caveats:  Adult themes, language, violence against catgirls
Rating:

Schlock Mercenary by Howard Tayler—A silly space romp starring a sarcastic and cynical troupe of mercenaries.
Updates: Daily 
Caveats:  Adult themes, language, ominous hummm
Rating:

Queen of Wands by Aeire—Catch this one now.  Aeire is re-running her old strips with commentary.  I don't know what will happen when she's finished and starts her new comic, but her last comic no longer exists anywhere on the net.
Updates: Daily
Caveats:  Adult themes, language, violence against computer-store employees
Rating:

College Roomies from Hell By Maritza Campos—I doubt I could do this one justice in a capsule review.  Go read Rober Howard's Tangents on the subject.
Updates: MWF
Caveats:  Adult themes, language, violence
Rating:

Wapsi Square by Paul Taylor—It's just damn good.
Updates: Daily (but not weekends)
Caveats:  Adult themes, language
Rating: